Meme Time

It's been a while since I checked out what the almighty Google has to say. In the standard Google Meme, you take your first name and then a verb and report the first thing Google returns for that search. But with my very common first name I sometimes have to proceed down a few entries to find one suitable for publishing. (If you are curious why I edit, google "Dan likes" and check out the first two results. Might be OK if I were of a different sexual persuasion and lived south of the border, but not for the current reality.)

Here is my version of the Google Meme with commentary. Note that keeping score is important!

Dan needs: Your help.
This is right on the button. I need your help finding a real live job. Any and all offers considered.
Google: +1.

Dan looks like: he's kind of checking out the Angel's rack.
 -or-
Dan looks like: a Ninja.
Given that I don't know the Angel, I kind of doubt I'd be doing that. I also bear no resemblance to a Ninja the last time I looked.
Google: -1.

Dan likes: showing his butt on Flickr.
Google strikes out again. At least to the best of my knowledge, I don't even have a picture up on Flickr, let alone one that shows that particular part of my anatomy.
Google: -1.

Dan wants: to be a stripper.
I guess I can go with this one. I've never really considered it as a career option, but I figure I could clear the room in seconds with no problem. Oh, you mean I'm supposed to attract people? Never mind.
Google: -1.

Dan does: It
 -or-
Dan does: your radar reach Iowa?
I guess I do it. It all depends on which it I guess. But I definitely don't have a radar and so I don't think it reaches Iowa.
Google: 0.

Dan hates: SPAM.
Google nails one.
Google: +1.

Dan goes: cynical.
 -or-
Dan goes: to the wrong house after the bar.
Once again a problematic one to score. Google hit it on the nose with the cynical, but so far as I remember I have never gone to the wrong house after the bar. Maybe Google knows something I don't.
Google: +1.

Dan loves: Me.
 -or-
Dan loves: eggs.
Well if you are L or family or ... from real life, yes I do love you. But if you are a random stalker from Peoria, maybe not. And the egg thing? Not too much.
Google: 0.

Dan has: a lot of Stuff to do.
 -or-
Dan has: Potential.
 -or-
Dan has: No Friends.
Well, there is some truth to all of the above. I'd probably give Google a -1 for the no friends remark, but I could go with the potential. And I certainly to have a lot of stuff to do, so have fun and give the Google oracle a try to see how your  life is going.
Google: +1

Net Google Score: +1+1-1-1-1-1+0+1+1+0+1 = +1