Have You Ever Lost ...

Time once more for for Mama Kat's Writer's Challenge. Today we will attempt the death defying feat of tackling prompts 2 and 4. To wit:

2.) “What did you once lose? Write about your search to find it again.” (inspired by writingfix.com)

4.) Begin each line of your post with “have you ever”. (inspired by Vikki from Live. Laugh. Pull Your Hair Out)

#2 - I have lost many things over the course my life. Some have been trivial material things, some have been things that only come to mind in an odd moment, and some are of a more subjective nature (like my sanity?). Some have been people. Some have been abilities.

The most perplexing thing that I lose periodically is the ability to enjoy life as it happens. Like most scientists and engineers, I am sometimes obsessive about things going according to plan. When I am in that phase, it feels like I have lost the ability to enjoy life as it occurs in real time. I start planning everything and anxiously waiting for each and every event to happen. Even small deviations from the expected occurrence stream can suck the joy out of the whole sequence of events. Needless to say, it is not a good state to be in. Nor is it fun to hang out with me when I'm in the state.

It took me a long time to realize that the way out of that state of mind and back to enjoyment is to wear mental blinders. I have to consciously decide to experience each event without expectation and correlated observation. You might say it requires practicing Zen to achieve a zen-like state. I always thought that the explanation from the Wikipedia article on Zen captured the essence:

Zen emphasizes experiential prajñā in the attainment of enlightenment. As such, it de-emphasizes theoretical knowledge in favor of direct realization through meditation and Dharma practice.

So maybe happiness and enjoyment of life *is* Zen enlightenment. {*grin*}


#4 - Have you ever? I have.

Have you ever chopped alfalfa? With a 40 foot head on a Field Queen? While dragging a semi trailer behind?

Have you ever changed oil in heavy equipment, lying on the ground, in the field, at night, trying to get done before all the rattle snakes finish homing in on the heat of the cooling engine?

Have you ever set a new land wriggle and crawl record due to the above?

Have you ever been in a fatal automobile accident?

Have you ever won a science fair?

Have you ever gotten drunk? With your faculty advisor?

Have you ever had your work published?

Have you ever held elected office?

Have you ever lived in Colorado? New Hampshire? California? Illinois? New York?

Have you ever wondered what happened to your kindergarten classmates?

Have you ever had a hole in one on the golf course?

Have you ever broken a bone? More than one?

Have you ever had surgery? More than one?

Have you ever played college athletics?

Have you ever shot a shotgun? Pistol? Rifle?

Have you ever thought that you have written more than enough "have you"'s?